What up January? Yeah, it's me, Becky, calling. Do you remember me saying that 2010 was going to be our year? Yeah it was. But guess what, there are 5 days left in you and you've managed to make it feel like 2010 is going to be WORSE than 2009! How are you letting that happen? There have been multiple missteps, speed bumps. A serious shame attack, seven day work weeks, a terrible cold, five days straight of rain in Los Angeles, dental surgery? The number of "Thank You" notes I've had to write in 2010 are staggering. And don't even try to begin to convince me that these things are "Character building." It's bullshit. Well, I'm calling to let you know that you can make it up to me on the last three days of the month. Yup, you guessed it. You'll be making sure that my three days in San Francisco are completely fabulous as compensation for the severe shittiness of the rest of the month of January. You have the chance to save some face here.
Oh and stop playing so much Sigur Ros when I put my iPod on shuffle in the car. I get it, life is sweetly sad and deserves a painful soundtrack right now. And I can never keep track of the umlaut's and the number of "h's" in my favorite songs and you just want to remind me which ones are worth listening to, but I don't need to know just how sad it should feel to be every third song . Every 13th or 14th is just fine, and you can even keep throwing in that Radiohead as a bookend, but still, every 3rd is excessive.
December was SO good, and I have a calendar that says February will be the same as December, so why did you suck so goddamn hard, January? You sucked like you could actually figure out how many licks it took to get to the center of that tootsie pop. I hate you, and I'm hanging up now.
1 comment:
Amen. January was such an asshole. I have to say, though...I really haven't warmed to February quite yet, either...
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