Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Congratulations Jerkface

I need new brakes. I keep accidentally writing "breaks" and that would be something completely different. I hate needing stuff like this because it's something I don't want to pay for but will have to.  It's ok, car repairs are long overdue, but I'd be a lot more comfortable with this if I wasn't going to be out of work in a few weeks. Oh yeah, I'm going to be out of work in a few weeks and if you hear of something, keep me posted. I have yet to be in full panic mode about this. I feel like I have a security net somewhere that I'm falling towards and will eventually hit, but I just haven't fallen long enough to see it in sight. I don't go unemployed, it's not my style. I think because I like to be busy, have something to do, and working allows me to do something without having to be creative enough to come up with a hobby. Sad, isn't it, to have work be your hobby? At least my hobby pays. 

For now I concentrate on the brakes at hand, and a weekend getaway that is so close I can taste the cheese. I'm not one to often make rash decisions, but lately I've had a pretty good reason to follow the more wild side of my head and heart. There's this older woman who lives in my new apartment building. I don't think she's alone, but she spends a lot of time milling about the courtyard. I don't think I'll be alone when I get older, or rather I hope not to be, but if I do end up that way I would love to be sitting in that courtyard thinking of the strange and exciting things I did at 28, instead of regretting not having done them. I know that sounds so cliche, or so obvious, but a lot of people sit by the way side and let things happen past them, or don't even have the opportunity at all and here I sit on my island of wonderful chance. How dare I not take all of it. How shameful to give it all up. 

Do what you love, and love what you do, I suppose. And right now there is no doubt in my mind that I love what I'm doing. There are just not enough hours of the day for me to enjoy it in its fullest. 

1 comment:

Lisa said...

Amen. Well said.